Trying to be hopeful...

To say that this weekend was tiring would be an understatement. It was fun, but thoroughly exhausting. That seems typical for our lives right now. One {or both} of us is in a constant state of exhaustion – Daniel more often than me.

My drive to Murfreesboro, TN on Friday took an extra 2 hours thanks to I-40 being “open” but only one lane through the gorge {on the TN/NC state line}.

The weekend included a wedding, spending time with family, breakfast with friends and then driving to Chattanooga...

About 30 minutes outside of Chattanooga, we stopped and parked my car in South Pittsburg and Daniel drove us down to Scottsboro to show me where he worked and also to scope out areas, in case we decide to buy land and build a house at some point.

Coupled with longs hours of driving, not enough sleep and overall emotional exhaustion, this was a little much for me. South Pittsburg and Scottsboro are seriously rural. Intellectually, I knew they were rural, but actually seeing it. Wow. It was very overwhelming. I don’t know if I can live in such a rural area. I just keep thinking about things that are normal to me right now… coffee shops, bookstores, libraries, variety of eateries and grocery stores, movie theaters, etc... if we lived in these rural areas, that stuff would pretty much disappear. I am trying to wrap my head around it all.

On top of that I am so ready to be living where Daniel lives. Three months of separation has been difficult. It really wears you down. As my friend Courtney pointed out, there is this feeling of hopelessness that occurs when you live like this {she knows firsthand, they did the Charlotte to Chattanooga transition about 2 years ago}. I am thankful to have someone to talk to about how hard this is… someone who actually knows. I am also thankful that we have friend's who have so graciously let Daniel crash with them while we are separated.

On my drive back to Charlotte yesterday, it rained for a good portion of the way. I listened to the radio and a song about hope started to play. I looked up and the gray sky partially parted and I realized that I was staring at a rainbow. Through the rain. Through the despair I was feeling. There was a rainbow. It gave me hope that everything would work out.