Living for Today

The problem with living for today is that I am waiting for tomorrow. This puts me in a difficult place. On the one hand, I am beyond ready to move forward with my life in Chattanooga. On the other hand, I am still {6+hours away} in Charlotte and there is no official end in sight.

Last year, I really wanted to start growing my own vegetables. But I put it off. I was worried that Daniel would get a job offer and we would have to sell our house and move. Because I put it off, I didn't grow that garden. Now it is a year later and Daniel does have a job but I still don't have a garden because I am waiting for our house to sell.

Last year I also had the opportunity to participate in a triathlon with a friend. Even though I really wanted to participate in the race, I opted out because 1) I felt guilty spending money while Daniel was unemployed and 2) I thought there was a chance that Daniel would get a job offer and we would have to move. The money part makes sense, but Daniel didn't get his job offer until the end of December and didn't start work until March 1. And I still haven't participated in a triathlon.

So... how long should you put off your life? There will always be what ifs to be concerned about and I don't want to live in the world of woulda, coulda, shoulda.

Another problem with waiting for job offers {or houses to sell or the right one to marry or babies...} is that these periods of waiting offer no definitive time frame. You are hoping things will work out, but you have no clue how long it will take. Chances are that it WILL take longer than you hope and, in the meantime, you need to keep living your life.

So while I continue to wait for this phase of my life to transition into the next, maybe I should take up gardening in pots {since I don't want to dig up the yard} or maybe I need to find a triathlon and go ahead and commit to doing something for myself.

What about you? What are you putting off for tomorrow?

"Never put off till tomorrow what you can do today."
 Thomas Jefferson

Project 52 Date Nights - Perspective

This weekend was a marathon of running errands - they {errands} seem to pile up when you are separated during the week. Saturday night, we picked up the movie, Up In The Air, and watched it while eating chocolate ice cream.

Watching a movie about people getting laid off really makes you thankful for your job... we are especially thankful that Daniel is no longer unemployed.

Saturday we also had the opportunity to check up on family members who live in Nashville and Memphis. Thanks to cell phones, Facebook and gChat, we were able to get a lot of live updates from loved ones and friends who were experiencing the great flood firsthand.

I have been having a seriously difficult time with being separated from Daniel over the past two months, but seeing and hearing about what so many other people are going through really puts my life in perspective. I need to be more thankful for the things that I have.

How I Met My House

We met our house almost 5 years ago. We had been in Charlotte for about 6 months and decided that we were ready to start looking for our first home. We knew that we wanted to renovate, so we were looking for something with good bones. I thought we would flip it and Daniel wanted something we could stay in for a while.

We started out searching the internet and agreed to go to an open house. We were the only viewers and didn't particularly care for the house. But we did sit down with the realtor, Mike, and honestly discussed what we were looking for. Mike was a veteran realtor and lifetime Charlotte native {a rare find}. He didn't pressure us and offered to take us to look at some houses.

We viewed one fixer upper and then Mike called us about Morganford. We drove through the neighborhood and loved it. It was in South Charlotte, not too expensive and had no Home Owner's Association {a plus for us}. We were able to look at it the next day. It seriously needed work, but we were sold. We immediately began dreaming of all the things we could do to it.

The day after our first viewing, we found out that other offers had been made, so we decided to throw our offer in as well. There were a total of three offers on the table and we were allowed the opportunity to rebid. This was a tough decision and we were sad to find out that our offer came in second.

So we went back to the drawing board. We scoured the internet for our perfect fixer upper. And Mike kindly took us to look at potential homes. But we couldn't finding anything that felt right. Not like Morganford did.

A month later, we got a call from Mike asking if we were still interested in the Morganford house. Are you kidding!?!?! YES. We. Still. Wanted. It. The buyer's financing had fallen through AND the seller was willing to sell us the home at our ORIGINAL offer price. We were ecstatic.

We immediately started dreaming again. We have spent the last 4.5 years perfecting those dreams. Through blood {several trips to the ER, including one for a chainsaw accident}, sweat {tons and tons of sweat}, and tears {arguing over paint colors or tile patterns or wanting to be DONE with this never-ending project}, we have finally achieved a home that we adore.

..........................................

And now we are moving. 

..........................................

It is bittersweet. Daniel was unemployed for one year, before landing a job based out of Chattanooga, TN. He moved March 1 and I am in Charlotte trying to sell our beloved house. We are sad to go. But also looking forward to meeting our next house and all that it has to offer.

The next house has a lot to live up to... 
But God is good and we are trusting that everything will work out.

Join the How I Met My House Party at SuburbanCottage.

TV or Not TV

I don't know whether to laugh or be disturbed by the Wednesday episode of The Middle.

In what must have been an effort to bring levity to the unemployment crisis, this episode shows the Heck family in a situation where they get behind on their bills and their electricity is turned off.

They talk to a financial coach who advises them to get rid of the non-essentials in life. Sadly, they are confused about what is considered non-essential, a far too common error. They finally agree to give up things like coffee-shop coffee and their precious cable television.

Initially their children are freaked out when faced with an indefinite amount of time with no television, but they prove to be resourceful and find things to occupy their time.

The parents are another story. Their discussions revolve around what TV shows they are missing. And one scene even portrays them sitting in their back yard, in lawn chairs... watching TV through their neighbors open window. After this incident, they decide they are in serious need of developing some hobbies.

The rest of the episode has a fairy tale ending... they win $1000 in a bingo game and Mr. Heck gets his job back. The financial coach had advised them to pay off all debt, but with their new-found money, they immediately go back to their cable television.

I find it extremely sad {and telling} that the parents couldn't enjoy their life together without TV. It is nice to have a show {or two} that you enjoy watching together, maybe snuggled on the couch. But to be so wrapped up in your shows, that you can't function in life without them is terribly sad. It also bothers me that it is normal to stay in debt and enjoy the non-essentials {no matter the cost}.

We have cable TV, but we cut back to basic cable several years ago. We don't miss regular cable and we have saved money over the years that we have been able to put towards other things. We have time to read and hang out and enjoy our various hobbies. We like watching 24 and Criminal Minds together, but if we miss an episode, it is not the end of the world.

I Love You Moore than Hollywood

Alabama that is. 

Today is exactly 9 months since Daniel was laid off. Hard to believe it has been that long (as my sister pointed out, we could have had a baby by now). 

I digress... this morning Daniel got the call we have been waiting for. The Tennessee Valley Authority (TVA) was on the phone with a job offer and a possible start date of mid January or the first of February.

All of a sudden things are in fast forward instead of on pause. Daniel officially has one week to think about and accept the offer. Since he was already scheduled to go to Jackson on Monday for an interview at a frozen food plant, he is going to proceed as planned. He will just be up front with them that he has another offer on the table. We are planning on accepting the TVA offer, but you never know. We will leave it up to God.

For some time I have prayed that God would make it abundantly clear to us where we should be. So we will continue to pray in that vein and if for some reason Jackson feels like the better fit, we will weigh our options and make the decision at the end of next week.

It is such a relief to have this burden lifted. Now we have to figure out things like 1) how fast can we finish our house/get it on the market; 2) how will I break the news to my employer - I am hoping to negotiate with them to keep me on and let me work from home; 3) where will we live/how soon should we move? Lots to think about in the coming weeks. For now we will take it one day at a time and be thankful for our blessings. 

Interesting side note... We have been wanting to purchase furniture for our basement for some time. But once Daniel was laid off, we really didn't feel like it was prudent to spend the money and that we should focus on saving it instead. 

Over the past 9 months, we have managed to save up quite a bit. After Daniel's very first interview (back in August), we agreed that once he got a job offer we would go ahead and purchase our furniture.

Well time passed and nothing seemed to be working out on the job front and we had all of this money saved up. So we decided to rethink our plan. Last week we discussed the situation and agreed that we had enough in our savings that it would be OK to go ahead and buy furniture. Then Daniel decided our life would be easier if we had a trailer to haul said furniture with. So he started looking on craigslist for a trailer. 

Nothing seemed to be working out, though we did manage to find and purchase an armoire through craigslist (which we proceeded to haul home in two trips on the roof rack of our Altima, but that is a story for another day.) See photo above.

In the end, we didn't end up getting a trailer and therefore did not get the furniture we have been wanting.

Then on Monday, Daniel found a great deal on a small trailer that would be perfect for us and he went about purchasing it with the intention that we would go THIS weekend to buy our furniture.

Then today he got his offer from TVA. He called to inform me that we could really buy our furniture and not feel bad about breaking our agreement because he had been offered a job! Praise God and pass the ammunition. OK, don't pass the ammunition, but definitely praise God for working this all out in his own time.

Oh. And for those of you who don't know where Hollywood, Alabama is, it is a small town (that is a loose word for where this nuclear facility is located) that is about an hour south of Chattanooga, Tennessee.

I Love You Moore than Recruiters

Daniel has been getting hammered by calls from recruiters recently. It's like a floodgate just opened. We are still waiting for an offer, but it is encouraging to feel like he is wanted. 

Today Daniel got confirmation of what will be a whirlwind trip to Jackson next Monday. He will fly to Memphis, pick up his rental and drive to Jackson for a plant tour and the initial part of the interview. The following morning he will do more interviewing with some big wigs that are being flown in from other company locations for the interview process, then he will be back in Charlotte by Tuesday afternoon.

I Love You Moore than Jackson, TN

A frozen food plant in Jackson you say? A phone interview on a Sunday you say? That is perposterous you say. We agree, but that is the update. This is the second interview by phone with a request to come in for an on site interview next week. Meanwhile we are still waiting.

I don't know that we would choose Jackson as our dream place to live, but times being what they are, beggars can't be choosers. The biggest thing that Jackson has going for it, is that it is almost halfway between Searcy and Nashville, with Memphis a short 1-hour drive away. Being able to visit family without driving 8-12 hours (each way) definitely has a lot of charm to it. While Alaska would be adventurous, it is soooo far away (not to mention we haven't heard anything back from them).

We are still hoping for Chattanooga to come through or something in Nashville, but if Jackson is what we get offered, we will take it.

Still Waiting, Still Love You More

Waiting really is the hardest part (thank you Tom Petty). Daniel is still sans job. Thank goodness for busy holidays to keep us distracted from the waiting.

Thanksgiving brought some new potential leads. The Gores (my aunt Becky's in-laws) were among the 35 celebrating Thanksgiving with us. This gave Daniel a chance to sit down and talk to Jonathan (his old roommate/Becky & Malvin's nephew). Jonathan got an offer with TVA (we are still waiting to hear about the position Daniel interviewed for), but he let us know that the position he is leaving will need to be filled and he would put in a good word for Daniel. It is contract work, so it would be temporary (up to a year of work), but it is something. This would be in Florence, Alabama.

Another friend from college talked to Daniel over the break and offered to pass his resume along to a Nashville recruiter.

And finally, Daniel talked with a recruiter yesterday about a position in Nashville. Since it is through a recruiter, we have no idea what company it is, but we are pretty sure it is Barge Waggoner (who Daniel interviewed with back in August).

Anyways, we are still waiting to hear. At this point, it would just be nice to get an answer (even if the answers were NO). At least then we wouldn't be sitting here. Waiting. Wondering. Hoping.

I Love You Moore than Alaska

Daniel's interview with Alaska Rim Engineering went well, though we won't hear anything for a few weeks. While the idea of moving to Alaska is alluring, in an adventurous sort of way, we are trying to be realistic about the whole thing.

Upon doing some research, moving the 4000+ miles to Palmer, Alaska is quite daunting. The expense and planning involved would be equivalent to moving to another country. All of this will factor in, if Daniel were to get an offer.

For now, we will continue to wait and try not to think too much about what it would mean to accept a job so far away.

I Love You Moore than Unemployment

The unemployment saga is continuing in the Moore household. Although we do have some good news to share after 8+ months of unemployment...

Daniel was contacted last week by the small company he interviewed with in Knoxville, TN. Unfortunately, they have been playing phone tag and we do not have concrete news.

Daniel called TVA (based in Chattanooga, TN) and they have been busy trying to secure permits for Bellefante, and have not made a decision yet. They hope to decide something in the "near future." Daniel thinks this is government speak for "We'll let you know when we are good and ready."

Daniel had a phone interview today with a company in Jackson, TN.

And the biggest new news is that a company from Alaska called today to set up a phone interview for tomorrow.

So that is where we are at. Ultimately, we are still waiting, but it is encouraging for things to feel like they are happening. Who knows, he might end up actually  having options.

Five Months, 11 Days and Counting...

Last night the news said that unemployment in the Charlotte area had dropped from 12% to 11.8%. Sadly, Daniel is not a part of contributing to the 0.2% drop. Maybe I am jaded but I don't know that such a tiny drop is cause for celebration.

I haven't written much about our unemployment in a recession experience. It is hard to know what to say. I have heard that if you are among the employed, you experience recession. If you are among the unemployed, it is depression. I suppose we are somewhere in the middle since I remain employed while Daniel is in his 5th month of unemployment (repression/decession maybe?).

Early on, we had a friend tell Daniel to expect to not expect more than a 5% response rate during his job hunt. At this point, we would be thankful for 5% worth of response. Daniel has only had 1 interview after applying to more than 100 places. It's hard not to get your hopes up when opportunities are so few. It's tough when things don't work out. I just remind myself that there are plenty of others that need the job just as badly.

Daniel recently read somewhere that Civil Engineering is dead in the south east US. I don't know if that is true or not, but based on the last 5 months, we can attest that things aren't looking so hot.

So how do I feel about unemployment? Mostly I am thankful that I have a job. We have buckled down and tightened our finances even more. Ironically we paid off all of our credit debt (home improvements) right away and managed to save quite a bit since then. It's hard not to want to go out and spend that hard-earned safety net - a 2nd vehicle, furniture for our empty (yet finished) basement and a new non-bubble-screened TV are all pretty tempting...

The government programs in place to "help" the economy are of little consolation to us. We already bought our first home. Our "clunker" does not meet the requirements of cash for clunkers (the gas mileage is too good for a trade). Not that we would buy a new car anyway. And the government offer of cheap Cobra insurance for unemployed is only useful IF you don't have the option to sign on (expensively) under your spouse... So since Daniel can get his med insurance through my company for the "bargain" of ~$400/month, he doesn't get the option of having 65% of his Cobra premium payed by Uncle Sam like some of his friends have.

I am not writing this for pity, just to give some perspective through the eyes of someone living with unemployment in tough economic times. However, if you happen to know of any civil engineering jobs, feel free to give Daniel a shout.

Update

You may have noticed that I haven’t written many notes lately. Chalk it up to not having much to say, but I really haven’t been sure what to write about… Should I write about life with an unemployed spouse? Should I write about how I feel about my own work? Should I post about my general restlessness or my thankfulness for spring (even with the onslaught of allergies).

Here is a quick recap of my trip to Memphis...
Last week/weekend I was able to spend a lovely five days with my (very pregnant) sister and her husband. Also saw my parents, grandma, great aunt and uncle and my sister’s in-laws. However, I did miss that my little brother couldn’t come visit, but that is life these days, you take what you can get…

Besides visiting with family, the highlight of the weekend was attending my sister's baby shower and surprising her with my gift... Five years ago, when Daniel and I went to Papua New Guinea, we bought a bilum for carrying babies. We figured someday, we would either use this bilum ourselves or we would share it with my siblings. To be truthful, I had forgotten about it until a few days before my flight to Memphis. I am so happy I remembered because when my sister opened it, she started crying because it was such an unexpected and special gift because she was actually born in PNG.

Angela with the bilum

And now a brief update on the unemployment status...
I figured that it is about time to give an update on how things are going with Daniel and the job search. To be truthful, we agreed that he should put off serious job hunting to allow time to study for his Professional Engineering (PE) licensure test, which thankfully he took last Friday. He feels good about the test, but we won’t know the results for a couple of months.

Now that he has extra time on his hands, he is focusing on finishing our house renovations. This week he is actually working on a house project for a friend, but I am anxious to get our basement and master bathroom finished.

At this point, we are taking life one week at a time. The job market continues to look bad in the Charlotte area, last I saw, unemployment is hovering around 12% and civil engineering job openings are practically non existent.

He has passed the one-month mark for unemployment and we are finding that we are able to live within our means and even save a bit. This is encouraging. It would be nice for Daniel to get a job, but this gives us some leeway for him to find a good job, hopefully in a good location. We are not really sure what the future holds for us, but in the mean time, we are not stressing about it.

Debt Free

I came home from work and asked Daniel what he wanted to do tonight. He just gave me a hug and said that we were going out. I was kind of surprised since we had agreed to limit eating out while he is unemployed. No questions asked, I got in the car and let him take me out for the evening.

On the way to dinner, I asked what special occasion would warrant us spending extra money. He just smiled and handed me a card. I opened it up and he had written me a sweet note, complete with a hand-drawn graph showing how as of today we have paid off debt (after 15.5 months of scrimping).

Technically "Debt Free" is a bit of a misnomer as we still have our mortgage and student loans to pay off. But as of today, we are completely free of credit card debt for the first time since we have been married (which includes everything we spent on all of our renovation projects over the past 3 years).

I have to admit, it feels pretty good to know that we don't have that debt hanging over our heads, especially with the current state of the economy.

Cheap Date

Daniel and I are pretty cheap. We always have been. When we were first married and literally had no money we would go hiking or camping on the weekend b/c it was basically free (gas was cheaper in those days).

We have continued to be frugal, but now that we are back to being a one-salary household, we are cutting out even more. First to go is my one visit to Starbuck's a week (guilty pleasures are not allowed when you are cutting back). We also planned to cut out all eating out. However, tonight we broke that rule and went to Moe's where we split a Joey Bag of Donuts and drank water for a grand total of $6.32.

We already live pretty sparingly, it is hard to know what else to cut. My monthly clothing allowance, along with Daniel's miscellaneous allowance is gone. I will now be brown bagging it every day for lunch as opposed to 3-4 days a week. We are considering getting slower internet, but that is pretty minuscule amount and internet is pretty important, especially since Daniel will be using it to job hunt. Daniel is also looking into getting cheaper car insurance. We have had basic cable for some time, I suppose we could always cancel it to save a few more bucks.

After our $6 meal, we went to Joseph-Beth's to read magazines and browse books. I happened to pick up the magazine, Real Living and they had an article called 71 ways to cut back. For us it was a bit of a joke to read. We either 1) flat out don't do the things it suggests cutting out (example cut out weekly fresh flowers for $20/week - who does that?) or 2) we have been doing the suggestions for years.

Tonight was a nice night (even on a super tight budget). We also had the extra treat of being able to visit with my grandparents on their layover in Charlotte, on their way home to Canada.

Another bonus to sharing meals is the potential for weight loss... this might not be so bad after all.