When
I was in college I lived in an all-girls dorm. One custom of where I lived was
that on special occasions (especially Valentine's Day) the front desks in the dorm
lobbies would be overflowing with special deliveries of flowers from girls'
boyfriends.
Every
special holiday I would trudge by the front desk of my dorm, head down, trying
to ignore what I knew wouldn't be there for me. I didn't have a boyfriend for
most of my college experience and when Daniel and I started dating, he didn't
realize that a show of flowers (at the lobby desk) might be important to me. To
be fair, I never told him.
After
we were married, one of my aunts told me that one secret to a happy marriage
was to let your spouse know your expectations upfront. If flowers or presents
are important, you need to communicate that (beforehand). In
truth, I don't really care about flowers or gifts – maybe I conditioned myself
to not care all of those years ago. In fact,
Daniel and I have always had a no gift policy (though I have asked him to give
me flowers for special occasions).
Ironically,
all of these years later, I finally have a boy in my life who loves to give me
flowers just because. Don’t get me wrong, Daniel gives me flowers at special times throughout the year and he is the one that told Jack that they should buy flowers for me because they love me, but Jack loves to give me flowers all of the time regardless of whether or not there is a special occasion to celebrate.
The
first time, Jack helped Daniel pick out flowers for me for Easter this year. It
was a sweet surprise. He was very excited to tell me that they bought me
flowers because they love me. The second time, he picked out flowers with his
Nana’s help to give to me when I came home from the hospital with Isaac. Then
more recently, while grocery shopping with me he insisted that he pick out
flowers for me.
I
really do love these little gifts of flowers. Even better are the
flowers (weeds) that he picks from our yard. He insists on filling a vase with
water and putting the vase on the counter. He is so proud of this
accomplishment and it makes my heart feel like it will explode.
So I didn’t get
flowers in the lobby while in college, but I have a husband of almost 13 years who loves me and listens to my request
for flowers throughout the year. And on top of that, I have a little boy who
loves to give me flowers just because his daddy told him that is one way they can show that they love me.
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