It's So Hard to Say Goodbye

I have been a member of the Y since 2005 when we lived in Charlotte. In CLT, my workouts were lunch breaks and I was very focused on getting in and back to work in an allotted amount of time. 

Since moving to the Chattanooga area seven years, the Y became an unexpected place of friendship. While I navigated those early years of motherhood, I would diligently go to the Y and stay afterward to let my kids play at the playground there. 

In those workouts and play times, I chose to put my phone away and be vulnerable and make friends with other moms who were doing the same thing. I have to tell you, I have made friends with some of the very best people over the years. And over the years, some of these families have moved away.

Today was a last workout with one of these families. We are happy for them but sad for us. We have had so many memories together at the Y that have morphed into homeschooling side by side. 

When we first met, we tentatively got acquainted through workouts and on the playground at the Y. Since we were obviously all homeschooling we settled into conversation about how it was going and what methods we were using.

Eventually our family ended up joining their family's homeschool co-op (we didn't realize it at first!). Co-op meant weekly meet ups outside of the Y. Which led to field trips and weekly hikes.

Due to Covid at the end of March of 2020, we took a break from real life interaction for about three months, but in June we were back at the Yworking out in the parking lot together, letting our kids play. We would bring bikes and scooters and games and the kids found ways to entertain themselves.

Once school started back up, we began meeting every Monday afternoon for playground dates with other co-op moms.

Over the last school year we have spent so many Monday afternoons freezing at parks, but it has been a lifesaver. We kept up with the weekly hikes and have had so many adventures together over the last year.

 

 

I don’t know what my kids will do without their buddies to play with while I work out. It’s the end of a season and we are sad to see it go. 

Staying.

You could say that I know a thing or two about leaving – we have moved three times in the last five-ish years, including a three-month stint in a camper and a six-month period living in a different hotel or vacation home on a weekly basis. And let's not even get started on the fact that I have moved a total of 18 times in my life, not including my college years. So leaving, I'm good at that.

Staying. Staying is much harder for me. I'm trying to make peace with it. I want my boys to grow up in a place where they will hopefully have friends that last a lifetime. But I may always feel the tug to move on.

This transient side of me has learned to make friends almost anywhere, but more often than not, the people I connect with are also the moving type. I guess we gravitate toward each other because we understand what it is like, this impermanence. This year I have already said goodbye to a new friend who moved to Idaho, and last week I dropped by to see a friend who is headed to Montana soon.

I'm excited for them, but it's hard to be the one on the saying goodbye side of things. I'm sad to see them go, and also a teeny bit jealous perhaps. Jealous of their new adventure? I don't know. I guess I'm just in an antsy phase. We have been in our current town for three years now which is enough time to feel settled, but also historically this is about the time that life uproots me...