Weekly Meal Plan

Thankfully I have a 4-year-old who will eat almost anything (or at the very least try new things). I am a big believer in introducing as many kinds of foods as possible to my kids, not to mention I just like to try new things. So really, by default, my family kind of has to try new things. Here are the meals I cooked recently:

Loaded Steak Nachos 

[recipe from Delightful-E-Made]

This meal was a winner with everyone in our family. It was a quick and easy mid-week meal. Daniel had to eat it rewarmed because he worked late, but it still tasted good reheated in the oven an hour later.

BBQ Salmon and Crispy Chickpea Salad

[recipe from How Sweet It Is]

Jack is rarely interested in soups or salads, so for him I typically make a deconstructed version of our meal. In the case of this meal I let him skip the salad part and served it with a side of rice along with the corn and roasted chickpeas. 

The salmon had a pretty strong BBQ rub on it, so I was surprised that Jack gobbled it up. Daniel and I both really enjoyed the combination of flavors in this dish.

Mexican Tortilla Casserole
[recipe adapted from A Cup of Jo] 

For a twist on Taco Tuesday, I made this Mexican Tortilla Casserole and it was a hit. I made it to share with a friend and it was easy enough to double the recipe at the time of assembly. Instead of doubling the beans, I chose to add browned ground beef instead. This dish works great as leftovers.

Rotini With Butternut-Sage Sauce
[recipe adapted from A Cup of Jo]

When making this dish I decided to add crumbled sausage for some extra protein. Also since Isaac is in the beginning stages of learning to eat, I saved some of the pureed butternut squash and onions for him to have separate from the pasta. He ate a decent amount but made a face every time I spooned it into his little mouth!

This dish is a healthier version of homemade Mac-N-Cheese. The pureed squash serves as the sauce instead of cheese. I barely noticed that there was no cheese in this dish and Jack gobbled it up without a second thought.

Naan Personal Pizzas

So this recipe was a repeat from a couple of weeks ago. This time I used Naan bread instead of Pita. I think I prefer the Pita. Both are delicious though. I chopped up mushrooms as small as I could before sauteing them, in an effort to sneak them onto the pizza. Both Daniel and Jack noticed. You win some, you lose some. 

This meal is great if you need to make something quickly (plus it is easy to customize). I actually ran out of cheese and had to grate little packets of cheese – oops!

Chai Latte 
[recipe from Live Simply]

I recently dug out an espresso machine that I received for Christmas several years ago. I have been treating myself to daily lattes. I decided to try out a Chai Latte in my machine. It worked out fairly well – I just placed the tea bags and spices in my coffee filter and then steamed my milk as usual. It turned out pretty well. The linked recipe tells you how to make this drink on the stove top without an espresso machine.

More Than Just a Mom

Last year I read this post on A CUP OF JO about Jo's struggle with postpartum depression. For her it didn't come until she was weaning her child. I found it interesting and must have stored the information from that article in the back of my cob-webby mommy brain.

Anyways, I didn't really think that I would struggle with strong emotional feelings when it came to pregnancy and motherhood. I am a fairly stoic person and not overly emotional. While pregnant, I can count on one hand the number of times I cried for no reason. I even saw the movie "The Help" and I didn't cry. Surrounded by women in a theater and very pregnant and I didn't even tear up. 

After Jack came along I jumped into the business of being a mom and don't recall feeling anything unusual. When my period came back I had intense cramps but no strong emotional feelings to go with it. All of this to say that I appeared to be returning to my normal, even after giving birth.

So, it has been a bit of shock that as I come to the end of nursing my sweet boy {we are in the process of weaning, and Sunday will be the last day} I have been feeling at odds with myself. I have felt lost in a sea of motherhood. Some days I feel that all I am is a mom and it overwhelms me. I have been having odd panicky feelings surrounding death and illness that grip me in the night. Bouts of insomnia have plagued me the last couple of weeks. And I wonder what is going on.

Then I remember reading this article and I think, this could be what is going on.*

And it makes me feel a bit better.

I have also been reminding myself that while I love being a mom and Jack has made me a better person, I am more than that. There are roles that I filled before I became a mother that I still fill today. None of that has changed. Some of those roles may have shifted in priority, but they still exist.

Wife. Daughter. Sister. Friend. Christian. Artist. Outdoor Enthusiast. Good Cook. Adrenaline Junkie. Designer. World Traveler. Lover of Books and Learning.

I think my recent feelings are why it was so important to me to go hiking last weekend. I didn't care that it was a bit cool or that we got a late start and would only be able to squeeze in a couple of miles. I desperately needed to feel like me. I needed to do it for myself. I needed to do it so that I could be a better wife and mom. It is why I have been forcing myself to go workout with a group a couple of times a week. Even though it is dark and cold out, I need those moments to clear my mommy head and feel like I am me again. No other obligations, just me.

*Note that I don't think I am suffering from any kind of severe depression. Certainly not anything debilitating. It is more that I have just been struggling with my own personal identity and I think that some of what I have been going through could be linked to hormonal changes that go along with weaning a baby.  

Not What I Expected

Have you been following along at A Cup of Jo as various women share their experiences of working and balancing motherhood? It has been a fascinating read.

More than anything it makes me realize how much my life has changed in the last year and how much more it will change in the year to come.

July 16th of 2010 was my last day at my job. Daniel and I had finally sold our house and it was time for me to join him in Chattanooga. It was bittersweet. In the days that followed, I handled the closing of our house, loaded what was left of our things into the car and drove Sophie and myself to Tennessee.

It was time. Daniel and I needed to be together again.

I always thought I would somehow manage to work at least part time and still be a mom. I never expected that the economy would fail so terribly. That we would end up moving to a tiny town in rural Alabama or that I would pretty much exit the work force before the age of 30. I didn't expect "keeping house" to be my main priority after more than 8 years of working full time. 

In one sense this new phase of life has been a relief. There was a year where I worked two jobs {teaching at night and working as a graphic designer during the day}. That was too much. Then another year of trying to hold it together while Daniel went through a layoff and 365 days of being unemployed. That was tough.

And now, we expect our first born. 

I know my role will change. It is doubtful that I will find full-time work in the "real" world in the near future – believe me I have tried. Most likely my work will shift to taking care of our child. It is a scary thought. But at the same time, I am ready to have more purpose in my life. I am ready to embrace change. To learn new things. To do something I haven't done before.

It wasn't what I expected. I thought my life would be more like those I read about in the posts about balancing motherhood and work. Sometimes you just have to embrace the life you are given.