Thursday Things (Things I Have Learned Since Graduating from College)

Things I Have Learned Since Graduating from College

Ten years ago, I graduated from college. The path my life has taken is not one I would have ever expected. Here are a few things that I have learned along the way...

1. You can plan all you want but your life probably isn't going to turn out how you envisioned.

2. Getting a degree an education matters more than your actual field of study. Case in point: I have a B.S. in Fine Art {I don't think I have met anyone with this particular degree} but I have managed to work as a graphic designer and a teacher and now I am a mom who freelances from home.

3. You will spend the majority of your life doing your "job." If you happen to be one of the select few who gets to do what they absolutely love every day, awesome. For the rest of us, figure out what you are passionate about and make sure you spend some of your free time pursuing that passion. This will go a long way towards making your life more fulfilling.

4. Make sure you have someone in your life who will encourage you – your spouse, a close family member or friend. Everyone needs a cheerleader for when the going gets tough.

5. At some point, it's going to get tough. Bad things happen... People will mistreat you... you may lose your job... or have to move... you may experience a divorce in your family... sickness... death... All of these things are a part of life. These experiences will probably be very painful. Accept them and keep moving forward.

6. Don't dwell in the past. Live your life today. Don't hold grudges or be bitter. That kind of attitude is toxic. Along these same lines, recognize when you make mistakes. Don't keep reliving those mistakes. Make a change in yourself and do the best you can to be a better person. Try to treat everyone you meet with love and respect.

7. Figure out your finances. Get out of debt asap. As the Dave Ramsey mantra states: “If you will live like no one else, later you can live like no one else.” 

8. Never stop learning. 

9. Develop a hobby. Volunteer. Learn how to cook or paint or cross stitch. Go take a hike. Start running or train for a triathlon. Develop a love of books or movies. Do something that is just for you. You need at least one thing that is yours alone. Your happiness should not be wrapped up solely in another person or another person's hobbies. Along with this, don't compare yourself to those around you. Blogs, Facebook and Pinterest make it look like everyone else lives amazing lives and has it together. Believe me, they don't.

10. Be thankful every day. There are no guarantees of tomorrow. Don't waste your life wishing you had someone else' life. The grass is always greener where it is watered... get out there and water your own grass.

We Choose Love...

Be each other's best friend. 

Be your mate's confidant. Their safe haven. 

Do fun things together. 

Have hobbies that you mutually like.

Let your mate do things they like. Without you. 

Do stuff you like. Without them. It's ok. It will give you things to talk about later. 

Share experiences together. 

Try new things. 

Travel.

If you need something in the relationship, tell the other person. 

Chances are, they are not a mind reader. 

Pray together at dinner time – it will remind you to be thankful at least once a day. 

Try things your partner likes, even if you aren't crazy about them 

{I learned how to shoot a gun and ride a motorcycle}.

Learn something new together {we have learned how to rock climb and scuba dive}.

Dance together in the kitchen.

Always kiss each other goodbye in the morning {even if it's before daylight and one of you is still in bed, asleep}.

Always say "I love you" when you hang up the phone.

Listen when your loved one complains about their job. Or their family. Or whatever. Don't try to fix it {unless they ask}, just let them vent.

If you like kids, have a baby. Or two. Or more. But only when you are both ready. They will make you fall in love all over again. They may also drive you a little crazy at times.

If you aren't into having kids, get a pet.

If you don't like pets, that's okay too.

Email or txt or chat throughout the day.

Get away from technology. 

Stare at the stars.

Lay in a hammock together. 

Learn how to argue.

Sometimes agree to disagree – especially if you both absolutely think you are RIGHT and don't want to give in.

Forgive and forget. I'm serious. Don't bring up the past.

Never bring up the D word.

Let your partner have the remote control.

Marriage Advice According to Daniel...

This weekend Daniel told me about the advice that he recently gave to a couple of his engaged co-workers. I thought it was interesting to hear a guy's perspective on getting married.

Advice Part 1: Registering for china

Under no circumstances should you let your bride-to-be convince you to register for china. It will sit in a box for a long time, until you finally have a hutch to display it in. Then it will sit in the hutch. It will collect dust and you will only use it once a year - at which time you will have to clean it before you eating AND after eating. Not worth it {in Daniel's mind}. It is better to register for daily dishes that are durable since you will use then on a daily basis. 

Note: we own china and have only used it a handful of times in almost eight years.

Advice Part 2: ALWAYS be honest 

I think this bit of advice stems from the younger guys asking if you should tell your fiance she looks fat IF she initiates the conversation by asking you, "Does this make me look fat?" Or if she asks something like, "Do I have anything in my teeth?" Daniel has learned that you should just be honest. If you can't be honest about these little things when you are engaged, do you really think it will be easier to be honest about these things after you are married? What about the big things?