something gave...

 Daniel and I always joke that I just sit around and eat bon bons all day. 

I tease him that he just sits around and eats bon bons on the weekends.

Last week I wrote about being so busy that something was going to have to give {at the time, the give was housekeeping, groceries, exercise, etc.}. Well then something really did give.

I got sick.

After two nights of sleep training my little one and one night of staying up until 3am to finish a project for a client, I woke up with a sore throat. I could barely swallow. At least I wasn't achy. But I definitely didn't feel well.

By day two with a sore throat, I happened to look in the mirror and noticed a white spot on my uvula. I texted my sister to see if she would advise seeing a doctor {I HATE going to the doctor}. Since I have a baby at home, she suggested I go to the doctor, especially since white spots could indicate strep.

I heeded her advice and scheduled an appointment with my doctor. One great thing about living in a small town is that I got in right away. 

Getting your throat swabbed has to be one of the worst experiences ever. It makes me gag and is almost impossible for me to relax enough to let them do it {my dad told me he once had to get a shot in his uvula!!! I don't think I would be capable of sitting still long enough for someone to stick a needle down my throat}.

The doctor was very friendly and told me I didn't have strep, but I did have an ulcer on my uvula. He said my body was probably just stressed and this was it's way of showing it. He went ahead and prescribed me antibiotics to prevent it from becoming strep. 

When I left the doctors, I noticed that the sheet with my prognosis said "acute pharyngitis." I went home and googled pharyngitis. Basically it is doctor's speak for "sore throat." 

In addition to the meds, I have been trying various home remedies. 

• I leaned my head back and shook salt into my throat...
• I licked a spoon covered in honey with 1/4 tsp of tumeric mixed in {this just turned my toothbrush yellow later that day}...
• I drank broth that I made by simmering an onion and a whole garlic...
• Several times a day I make hot tea with honey and lemon...
• I eat popsicles and ice cream at regular intervals {these are the only things that soothe the pain}...

I will be thankful when this sore throat goes away. In the meantime I am enjoying ice cream and popsicles with every meal and am extremely thankful that Jack has taken to the sleep training and is sleeping through the night now. It is allowing me to catch up on some much needed rest.

Not What I Expected

Have you been following along at A Cup of Jo as various women share their experiences of working and balancing motherhood? It has been a fascinating read.

More than anything it makes me realize how much my life has changed in the last year and how much more it will change in the year to come.

July 16th of 2010 was my last day at my job. Daniel and I had finally sold our house and it was time for me to join him in Chattanooga. It was bittersweet. In the days that followed, I handled the closing of our house, loaded what was left of our things into the car and drove Sophie and myself to Tennessee.

It was time. Daniel and I needed to be together again.

I always thought I would somehow manage to work at least part time and still be a mom. I never expected that the economy would fail so terribly. That we would end up moving to a tiny town in rural Alabama or that I would pretty much exit the work force before the age of 30. I didn't expect "keeping house" to be my main priority after more than 8 years of working full time. 

In one sense this new phase of life has been a relief. There was a year where I worked two jobs {teaching at night and working as a graphic designer during the day}. That was too much. Then another year of trying to hold it together while Daniel went through a layoff and 365 days of being unemployed. That was tough.

And now, we expect our first born. 

I know my role will change. It is doubtful that I will find full-time work in the "real" world in the near future – believe me I have tried. Most likely my work will shift to taking care of our child. It is a scary thought. But at the same time, I am ready to have more purpose in my life. I am ready to embrace change. To learn new things. To do something I haven't done before.

It wasn't what I expected. I thought my life would be more like those I read about in the posts about balancing motherhood and work. Sometimes you just have to embrace the life you are given.