Wednesday, November 04, 2015

Thirty Five

Entering my 30s was rough for me. The summer before my 30th birthday I quit a good job, sold a house in another state and was living in a 30-ft camper in a campground. Life was feeling bleak and very much on hold. I felt like there were so many things I had failed to accomplish as I stared 30 in the face, and I was really lonely. 

Five years later, so much has changed. I am in a very different place – literally. We have moved twice in the last five years [Hollywood and Signal Mountain] and we now have two precious boys [Jack and Isaac].

My lower cupboards are full of kid's plates and cups. I find toy cars, swords and dinosaurs in the oddest places. I have an ever-growing pile of kid's artwork that I haven't quite figured out how to deal with. I change poopy diapers on a daily basis, haven't had a good night's sleep in a while, and answer a never-ending string of "why" questions. But I wouldn't change my life for anything.

I didn't cross many new items off of my List of 100 Things to do in my lifetime, but that doesn't bother me. My life is full and, even with the hard moments, my 30s have been my favorite decade. Each passing year is better than the last.

I don't know if the changes in me are because of motherhood, or if it stems from the wisdom you can only gain with age. Perhaps difficult life experiences have helped me embrace where I am today instead of longing for what I don't have. I don't know. At 35 I am no longer looking for the adult in the room, and I don't feel like I have to prove myself to gain validation from others. I don't have regrets, even though there are some things I wish I could do. I am embracing the season of life that I am in.

There are elements of my life that I would change if I could – namely Daniel's long hours and commute time, but we have learned to make the most of a challenging circumstance, and I know that life as it is right now won't stay this way forever. There will be more hardships, but I believe that there are also wonderful days ahead.

Here are Five Things I hope to do before 40 (though, hopefully I will have many more adventures and projects):
1) Participate in a Triathalon
2) Remodel our master suite
3) Take an epic road trip to visit various National Parks
4) Hike 100 miles on the Tour de Mt Blanc in France
5) Take a multi-day paddling trip in the Boundary Waters Wilderness Area

I can say without a doubt that I am looking forward to being 35 and all that the coming year holds.

Things Lists From Previous Years:

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